CHAPTER LVI

The duke and duchess did not repent of the joke played on Sancho Panza with regard to the governorship they had given him, especially because on that same day their steward arrived and recounted point by point, and almost in their entirety, Sancho’s words and actions during the days of his governorship, and finally he elaborated for them the attack on the ínsula, and Sancho’s fear, and his departure, giving them no small pleasure.

After this, the history recounts that the appointed day of the battle arrived, and the duke, having instructed his footman Tosilos over and over again how he was to confront Don Quixote and defeat him without killing or wounding him, ordered the iron tips removed from the lances, saying to Don Quixote that the Christianity on which he prided himself would not permit the encounter to put their lives at so much risk and danger, and Don Quixote should be content with the open field he was providing even though this contravened the decree of the Holy Council⁵⁷⁰ that prohibits such challenges, and he did not wish their fierce combat to be carried to the extreme.

Don Quixote said that His Excellency should arrange the details of the matter however he chose, for he would obey him in everything. And when the fearful day arrived, the duke had ordered a large platform erected at the front of the castle square, for the judges as well as the claimants, mother and daughter; infinite numbers of people came from all the surrounding towns and villages to see the unusual battle, for those who lived in that land, and even those who had died there, had never seen or heard of anything like it.

The first to enter the field of battle was the master of ceremonies, who scrutinized the field and walked all around it to be sure there was no deception and nothing concealed where one might stumble and fall; then the duennas came in and took their seats, wrapped in their cloaks to their eyes, even to their breasts, showing signs of no small emotion. Don Quixote entered the field, and shortly after that, accompanied by many trumpets, the huge footman Tosilos appeared at one end of the square on a powerful horse, overshadowing everyone, his visor lowered and sitting erect in strong and shining armor. His large, dappled horse appeared to be a Frisian,⁵⁷¹ and from each fetlock there hung an arroba of hair.

The valorous combatant came in, well-instructed by the duke his lord regarding how he was to behave with the valiant Don Quixote of La Mancha, and warned that under no circumstances was he to kill him but should attempt to flee the first charge in order to avoid the risk of Don Quixote’s death, which was certain if he was to meet him head-on. He crossed the square, reached the place where the duennas were sitting, and began to look at the one who wanted him for a husband. The master of the field summoned Don Quixote, who had come onto the square, and together with Tosilos he spoke to the duennas, asking if they consented to Don Quixote defending their cause. They said they did, and that everything decided in this matter they would consider correct, irrevocable, and binding.

By this time, the duke and duchess were seated in a gallery that overlooked the field, which was crowded with an infinite number of people waiting to see the fierce, unprecedented battle. It was stipulated by the combatants that if Don Quixote was victorious, his adversary would be obliged to marry the daughter of Doña Rodríguez, and if he was defeated, his opponent would be free of the promise demanded of him and need give no other satisfaction.

The master of ceremonies apportioned the sun⁵⁷² and directed each combatant to his place. The drums rolled, the air filled with the sound of trumpets, the earth trembled beneath their feet. The hearts of the crowd of onlookers were in suspense, some fearing and others hoping for the good or bad outcome of the matter. Finally, Don Quixote, commending himself with all his heart to God Our Lord and his lady Dulcinea of Toboso, waited to receive the precise signal to charge, but our footman had other ideas, for he was thinking only about what I shall tell you now:

It appears that when he looked at his enemy, Doña Rodríguez’s daughter, she seemed the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his entire life, and the little blind boy, ordinarily called Amor along these streets, did not wish to miss the opportunity that had been offered him to triumph over a footman’s soul and place it on the list of his trophies, and so he approached him very cunningly, without anyone seeing him, and he pierced the poor footman on his left side with an arrow two varas long that passed right through his heart; Amor could do this with complete impunity because he is invisible and comes and goes as he pleases, without anyone demanding that he account for his actions.

And so, I say, when the signal was given for the charge, our footman was in ecstasy, thinking about the beauty of the woman whom he had already made mistress of his liberty, and he did not attend to the sound of the trumpet as Don Quixote did, for as soon as he heard it he charged, and galloping as fast as Rocinante would permit, he attacked his enemy, and seeing him attack, his good squire, Sancho, called in a loud voice:

“May God guide you, flower and jewel of knights errant! May God grant you victory, for right is on your side!”

And even though Tosilos saw Don Quixote coming toward him, he did not move a step away from his position; instead, he called for the master of the field, who came to see what he wanted, and he said:

“Señor, isn’t this combat to decide if I marry or don’t marry that lady?”

“It is,” was the response.

“Well then,” said the footman, “I fear for my conscience, and I would put too great a weight on it if I went forward with this combat, and so I say that I declare myself defeated, and wish to marry that lady immediately.”

The master of the field was amazed at Tosilos’s words, and since he was one of those privy to the scheme, he did not know how to respond. Don Quixote stopped in the middle of his charge when he saw that his enemy was not attacking him. The duke did not know why the combat did not go forward, but the master of the field went to tell him what Tosilos had said, which left the duke astonished and extremely irate.

While this was happening, Tosilos went up to where Doña Rodríguez was sitting and said in a very loud voice:

“I, Señora, wish to marry your daughter, and I do not want to attain through disputes and battles what I can attain peacefully and with no risk of death.”

The valiant Don Quixote heard this and said:

“Since this is true, I am released and set free from my promise; let them marry, and good fortune to them, and since God Our Lord has granted the marriage, may St. Peter bless it.”

The duke came down to the castle square, and approaching Tosilos, he said:

“Is it true, O knight, that you declare yourself defeated, and that pressed by your timorous conscience, you wish to marry this maiden?”

“Yes, Señor,” responded Tosilos.

“He’s doing the right thing,” said Sancho Panza, “because if you give the cat what you were going to give to the mouse, your troubles will be over.”

Tosilos was loosening his helmet and asked for help because he was having trouble catching his breath and could not bear to be confined for so long in so narrow a space. It was quickly removed, and the footman’s face was uncovered and revealed, and seeing this, Doña Rodríguez and her daughter cried out, saying:

“Deception! This is a deception! They sent in Tosilos, a footman to my lord the duke, instead of my true husband! We demand the justice of God and the king against so much guile, not to say wickedness!”

“Do not grieve, Señoras,” said Don Quixote, “for this is neither guile nor wickedness, and if it is, the duke has not been the cause but the evil enchanters who pursue me, and who, envious of my achieving the glory of this victory, have transformed the face of your husband into that of this man, whom you say is a footman of the duke. Take my advice, and despite the guile of my enemies marry him, for he undoubtedly is the one you desire for your husband.”

The duke, who heard this, was about to turn all his anger into laughter, and he said:

“The things that befall Señor Don Quixote are so extraordinary that I am prepared to believe this man is not my footman, but let us make use of this stratagem and artifice: we shall delay the marriage for fifteen days, if you like, and keep this person, about whom we have our doubts, confined, and in that time he may return to his original appearance, for the rancor the enchanters feel toward Señor Don Quixote cannot last that long, especially since they derive so little profit from these tricks and transformations.”

“Oh, Señor!” said Sancho Panza. “It’s the habit and custom of these scoundrels to change the appearance of things that have to do with my master. They made a knight he defeated some days ago, who was called the Knight of the Mirrors, look like Bachelor Sansón Carrasco, who comes from our village and is a good friend of ours, and they turned my lady Dulcinea of Toboso into a rough peasant girl, and so I imagine that this footman will die and live a footman for all the days of his life.”

To which the daughter of Doña Rodríguez responded:

“Whoever this man is who asks me to be his wife, I thank him for it; I’d rather be the legitimate wife of a footman than the deceived mistress of a gentleman, though the one who deceived me is no such thing.”

In short, all these stories and events resulted in Tosilos being locked away until they could see the outcome of his transformation; all the spectators acclaimed Don Quixote as the victor, and most were sad and melancholy at seeing that the long-awaited combatants had not hacked each other to pieces, just as boys are sad when the hanged man they have been waiting for does not come out because he has been pardoned, either by the other party or by the court. The people left, the duke and Don Quixote returned to the castle, Tosilos was confined, Doña Rodríguez and her daughter were delighted to see that one way or the other, the matter would end in marriage, and Tosilos hoped for nothing less.