{"id":199,"date":"2019-12-01T16:45:24","date_gmt":"2019-12-01T16:45:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/chapter\/first-part-part-three-chapter-xviii-2\/"},"modified":"2020-03-15T08:18:59","modified_gmt":"2020-03-15T08:18:59","slug":"first-part-part-three-chapter-xviii","status":"publish","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/chapter\/first-part-part-three-chapter-xviii\/","title":{"rendered":"First Part. Part Three. Chapter XVIII"},"content":{"raw":"CHAPTER XVIII<\/a>\r\n
\r\n

Which relates the words that passed between Sancho Panza and his master, Don Quixote, and other adventures that deserve to be recounted<\/span><\/h2>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n

When Sancho reached his master, he was so weak and enfeebled that he could not even prod his donkey. Seeing him in this state, Don Quixote said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cNow I am convinced, my good Sancho, that this castle or inn is undoubtedly enchanted, because what else could those who so brutally took their amusement with you be but phantoms or beings from the next world? And I can attest to this because I saw, when I was at the wall of the corral watching the events in your sad tragedy, that it was not possible for me to climb over the wall or even to dismount Rocinante, and therefore they must have enchanted me, for I swear to you, by who I am, that if I could have climbed over or dismounted, I should have avenged you in a way that would have made those varlets and knaves remember the experience for the rest of their days, even though by so doing I should have contravened the laws of chivalry, which, as I have told you so often, do not permit a knight to raise a hand against one who is not a knight, except in defense of his own life and person in circumstances of urgent and great necessity.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI would have taken my revenge, too, if I could have, knight or no knight, but I couldn\u2019t, though in my opinion the ones who had so much fun with me weren\u2019t phantoms or enchanted beings, as your grace says, but men of flesh and blood, like us; and all of them, as I heard when they were making me turn somersaults, had names, and one was Pedro Mart\u00ednez, and the other Tenorio Hern\u00e1ndez, and I heard that the innkeeper\u2019s name was Lefthanded Juan Palomeque. And so, Se\u00f1or, your not being able to get over the corral wall or off your horse was due to <\/a>something besides enchantments. And what\u2019s clear to me in all this is that in the long run, these adventures we\u2019re looking for will bring us so many misadventures that we won\u2019t know our right foot from our left. And the better and smarter thing, to the best of my poor understanding, would be for us to go back home now that it\u2019s harvesttime, and tend to our own affairs, and stop going from pillar to post and from bad to worse, as they say.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cHow little you know, Sancho,\u201d Don Quixote responded, \u201cabout the matter of chivalry! Be quiet and have patience, for the day will come when you will see with your own eyes how honorable a thing it is to exercise this profession. If not, then tell me: what greater joy can there be in the world, what pleasure can equal that of conquering in battle and defeating one\u2019s enemy? None, most certainly there is none.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat must be true,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cthough I don\u2019t know anything about it; all I know is that ever since we\u2019ve been knights errant, or your grace has been one (because there\u2019s no reason to include me in so honorable a company), we haven\u2019t won a single battle except for the one with the Basque, and even there your grace came out missing half an ear and half a shield; since then it\u2019s been nothing but cudgels and more cudgels, beatings and more beatings, and for me the extra advantage of being tossed in a blanket by enchanted beings, but I can\u2019t take my revenge on them so I\u2019ll never know how great the pleasure is of defeating my enemy, as your grace says.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat is my sorrow, and it surely is yours as well, Sancho,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbut from this moment on I shall try to have at hand some sword so artfully made that whosoever carries it will be immune to any kind of enchantment; it well might be that fortune will grant me the one Amad\u00eds had when he was called The Knight of the Blazing Sword,<\/span> 132<\/a><\/span><\/sup> that being one of the best swords any knight in the world ever had, because, in addition to the virtue I have already mentioned, it cut like a razor, and no armor, no matter how strong or enchanted, could withstand it.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI\u2019m so lucky,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthat when that happens and your grace finds such a sword, it\u2019ll be exactly like the balm and only work for and benefit dubbed knights, while squires can just swallow their sorrows.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cDo not be afraid, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cfor heaven will deal more kindly with you than that.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

As Don Quixote and his squire were having this conversation, Don <\/a>Quixote saw a large, thick cloud of dust coming toward them along the road they were traveling, and when he saw it, he turned to Sancho and said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThis is the day, O Sancho, when the good fortune that destiny has reserved for me will be revealed! This is the day, I say, when, as much as on any other, the valor of this my arm will be proved, and I shall perform deeds that will be inscribed in the book of Fame for all time to come. Do you see that cloud of dust rising there, Sancho? Well, it conceals a vast army, composed of innumerable and diverse peoples, which is marching toward us.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s the case, there must be two,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cbecause over in the opposite direction there\u2019s another cloud of dust just like it.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Don Quixote turned to look, and he saw that it was true; he was overjoyed, thinking, no doubt, that these were two armies coming to attack and fight each other in the middle of that broad plain. Because at all times and at every moment his fantasy was filled with the battles, enchantments, feats, follies, loves, and challenges recounted in books of chivalry, and everything he said, thought, or did was directed toward such matters. The dust clouds he saw had been raised by two large flocks of ewes and rams traveling along the same road from opposite directions, which could not be seen through the dust until they were very close. But Don Quixote insisted so fervently they were armies that Sancho believed him and said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, then what should we do?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cDo?\u201d said Don Quixote. \u201cDefend and protect the needy and helpless. You must know, Sancho, that the army in front of us is led and directed by the great Emperor Alifanfar\u00f3n, lord of the great \u00cdnsula Trapobane;133<\/a><\/span><\/sup> the other, marching behind us, belongs to his enemy, the king of the Garamantes, Pentapol\u00edn of the Tucked-up Sleeve, so-called because he always enters into battle with a bare right arm.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhy do these two gentlemen hate each other so much?\u201d asked Sancho.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThey hate each other,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbecause this Alifanfar\u00f3n, a fierce pagan, is in love with Pentapol\u00edn\u2019s daughter, an exceedingly beauteous and charming lady, and a Christian, whose father does <\/a>not wish to give her to the pagan king unless he first renounces the law of his false prophet Mohammed and turns to her faith.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cBy my beard,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cPentapol\u00edn is doing just the right thing, and I\u2019m bound to help him any way I can!\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIn this you would be doing just as you should, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cbecause to enter into battles such as these it is not required to be dubbed a knight.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat\u2019s good enough for me,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cbut where will we put this donkey so we\u2019re sure to find him when the fight\u2019s over? Because I don\u2019t believe that riding into battle on this kind of animal has been the custom up to now.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat is true,\u201d said Don Quixote. \u201cWhat you can do is let him find his own adventures, regardless of whether he is lost or not, because we shall have so many horses when we emerge victorious that even Rocinante runs the risk of being exchanged for another. But listen to me, and look, for I want to name for you the most eminent knights riding in these two armies. And so that you may see and mark them more clearly, let us withdraw to that hillock, where we should be able to perceive both armies.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

This they did, riding to the top of a hill from which there would have been a clear view of the two flocks that Don Quixote took for armies if the clouds of dust they raised had not confused and blurred the sight of anyone looking at them, but despite this, in his imagination he saw what he did not see and what was not there, and in a loud voice he began to say:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat knight you see there in the gold-colored armor, who bears on his shield a crowned lion kneeling at the feet of a damsel, is the valiant Laurcalco,134<\/a><\/span><\/sup> lord of the Bridge of Silver; the other in armor with flowers of gold, who bears on his shield three crowns of silver on a blue field, is the redoubtable Micocolembo, grand duke of Quirocia; the one on his right with the gigantic limbs is the never fearful Brandabarbar\u00e1n de Boliche, lord of the three Arabias, whose armor is a snakeskin and whose shield is a door rumored to be one of those from the temple demolished by Samson when, with his death, he wreaked vengeance on his enemies. Now turn your eyes in the other direction, and you will see in front of <\/a>and at the head of the other army the ever victorious and never defeated Timonel of Carcajona, prince of Nueva Vizcaya, who wears his armor quartered\u2014blue, green, white, and yellow\u2014and who bears on his shield a cat of gold on a tawny field, with a legend that reads: Meow,<\/span> which is the beginning of the name of his lady who, they say, is the peerless Miulina, daughter of Duke Alfe\u00f1iqu\u00e9n of Algarbe; this other, who weighs down and oppresses the back of that powerful mare, whose armor is snowy white and whose shield is blank and lacking all devices, is a novice knight of the French nation, named Pierres Pap\u00edn, lord of the baronies of Utrique; that one, who with armored heels is kicking the flanks of that colorful swift zebra and whose armor bears blue vairs,135<\/a><\/span><\/sup> is the powerful duke of Nervia, Espartafilardo del Bosque, who bears as a device on his shield a bed of asparagus, with a legend in Castilian that reads: Follow my fate.\u201d<\/span> 136<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\r\n

And in this fashion he named many knights from the two hosts, which he was imagining, and for all of them he improvised armor, colors, legends, and devices, carried along by the imagination of his unheard-of madness, and without pausing he continued, saying:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThis host facing us is made up and composed of people from diverse nations: here are those who drink the sweet waters of the famous Xanthus;137<\/a><\/span><\/sup> the mountain folk who tread the Massilian plain; those who sift fine gold nuggets in Arabia Felix; those who enjoy the famous cool shores of the crystalline Thermodon; those who drain by many diverse means the golden Pactolus; and Numidians, untrustworthy in their promises; Persians, those notable archers; Parthians and Medes, who fight as they flee; Arabians, with movable houses; Scythians, as cruel as they are white-skinned; Ethiopians, with pierced lips; and an infinite number of other nations, whose faces I recognize and see, although I do not recall their names. In this other host come those who drink the crystalline currents of the olive-bearing Betis; those who shine and burnish their faces with the liquid of the forever rich and golden Tajo; those who enjoy the beneficial waters of the divine Genil; those who tread Tartessian fields, with their abundant pastures; those who take pleasure in the <\/a>Elysian meadows of Jerez; Manchegans, rich and crowned with yellow spikes of wheat; those clad in iron, ancient relics of Gothic blood; those who bathe in the Pisuerga, famous for the gentleness of its current; those who graze their cattle on the extensive pasturelands of the sinuous Guadiana, celebrated for its hidden currents; those who tremble in the cold of the wooded Pyrenees and the white peaks of the high Apennines; in short, all those contained and sheltered in the entirety of Europe.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Lord save me! What a number of provinces he mentioned and nations he named, attributing to each one, with marvelous celerity, the characteristics that belonged to it, so absorbed and immersed was he in his lying books!<\/p>\r\n

Sancho Panza hung on his words but said none of his own, and from time to time he turned his head to see if he could see the knights and giants his master was naming; since he could not make out any of them, he said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, may the devil take me, but no man, giant, or knight of all those your grace has mentioned can be seen anywhere around here; at least, I don\u2019t see them; maybe it\u2019s all enchantment, like last night\u2019s phantoms.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cHow can you say that?\u201d responded Don Quixote. \u201cDo you not hear the neighing of the horses, the call of the clarions, the sound of the drums?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI don\u2019t hear anything,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cexcept the bleating of lots of sheep.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

And this was the truth, because the two flocks were drawing near.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIt is your fear, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cthat keeps you from seeing or hearing properly, because one of the effects of fear is to cloud the senses and make things appear other than they are; if you are so frightened, withdraw somewhere and leave me alone; alone I suffice to give victory to the army to whom I shall proffer my assistance.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

And having said this, he spurred Rocinante, fixed his lance in its socket, and rode down the side of the hill like a flash of lightning. Sancho called to him, saying:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cYour grace, come back, Se\u00f1or Don Quixote, I swear to God you\u2019re charging sheep! Come back, by the wretched father who sired me! What madness is this? Look and see that there are no giants or knights, no cats or armor or shields either parted or whole, no blue vairs or bedeviled ones, either. Poor sinner that I am in the sight of God, what are you doing?\u201d<\/p>\r\n \r\n

But none of this made Don Quixote turn back; instead, in a loud voice, he cried:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cCome, you knights who follow and serve under the banners of the valiant Emperor Pentapol\u00edn of the Tucked-up Sleeve, follow me, all of you, and you will see how easily I give you revenge upon your enemy Alifanfar\u00f3n of Trapobane!\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Saying this, he rode into the midst of the host of sheep and began to run at them with his lance as fearlessly and courageously as if he really were attacking his mortal enemies. The shepherds and herdsmen guarding the flock came running, shouting for him to stop, but seeing that this had no effect, they unhooked their slings and began to greet his ears with stones as big as fists. Don Quixote took no notice of the stones; instead, he rode back and forth, crying:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhere art thou, haughty Alifanfar\u00f3n? Come here to me, for I am only one knight who wishes, in single combat, to try thy strength and take thy life as forfeit for the wrong thou hast done to the valiant Pentapol\u00edn Garamanta.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

At that moment, a small round pebble138<\/a><\/span><\/sup> came flying and hit him in the side, entombing two ribs inside his body. Seeing himself so battered, he undoubtedly believed he was dead or gravely wounded, and remembering his potion, he took out the cruet, put it to his mouth, and began to pour the potion into his stomach, but before he had finished swallowing what seemed to him a sufficient quantity, another almond came flying and hit his hand, striking the cruet so squarely that it broke into pieces, taking along three or four teeth and molars from his mouth and smashing two of his fingers.<\/p>\r\n

The first blow was so hard, as well as the second, that the poor knight could not help falling from his horse. The shepherds came running and thought they had killed him, and so they hurriedly gathered their flocks together, picked up the dead animals, which numbered more than seven, and left without further inquiry.<\/p>\r\n

All this time Sancho was on the hill, watching the lunatic actions of his master, and he tore at his beard, cursing the hour and the moment when fortune had allowed him to make his acquaintance. When he saw that Don Quixote was lying on the ground and that the shepherds had gone, he came down the slope and went over to his master and found <\/a>him in a very bad way, although he had not lost consciousness, and he said to him:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t I tell you, Se\u00f1or Don Quixote, to come back, that it wasn\u2019t armies you were attacking but flocks of sheep?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThis is how that thieving wise man, who is my enemy, can make things disappear and seem to be what they are not. You should know, Sancho, that it is very easy for those like him to make us see whatever they wish, and this villain who pursues me, envious of the glory that he saw I would achieve in this battle, has turned the contending armies into flocks of sheep. And if you do not believe me, by my life you can do something, Sancho, to be undeceived and see the truth of what I am telling you: mount your donkey and follow them, with some cunning, and you will see how, when they have moved a certain distance away, they resume their original form and are no longer sheep but real, complete men, just as I first described them to you\u2026. But do not go now, for I have need of your help and assistance; come here and see how many molars and teeth I have lost, because it seems to me I do not have a single one left in my mouth.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Sancho came so close that his eyes were almost in his master\u2019s mouth; by this time the balm had taken effect in Don Quixote\u2019s stomach, and just as Sancho looked into his mouth, he threw up, more vigorously than if he were firing a musket, everything he had inside, and all of it hit the compassionate squire in the face.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cMother of God!\u201d said Sancho. \u201cWhat\u2019s happened? Surely this poor sinner is mortally wounded, for he\u2019s vomiting blood from his mouth.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

But looking a little more closely, he realized by the color, taste, and smell that it was not blood but the balm from the cruet, which he had seen him drink, and he was so disgusted by this that his stomach turned over and he vomited his innards all over his master, and the two of them were left as splendid as pearls. Sancho went to his donkey to find something in the saddlebags with which to clean himself and heal his master, and when he did not see the saddlebags he almost lost his mind. He cursed his fate again and resolved in his heart to leave his master and return home even if he lost his wages for the time he had worked, along with his hopes for the governorship of the promised \u00ednsula.<\/p>\r\n

Then Don Quixote rose to his feet, placed his left hand over his mouth so that no more teeth would fall out, and grasped Rocinante\u2019s reins with the other, for the horse had not moved from his master\u2019s side\u2014that is how loyal and well-disposed he was\u2014and walked to where <\/a>his squire was standing, leaning against his donkey and resting his cheek in his hand, in the manner of a man deep in thought. And seeing him like this, showing signs of so much sadness, Don Quixote said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cYou should know, Sancho, that a man is not worth more than any other if he does not do more than any other. All these squalls to which we have been subjected are signs that the weather will soon improve and things will go well for us, because it is not possible for the bad or the good to endure forever; from this it follows that since the bad has lasted so long a time, the good is close at hand. Therefore you must not grieve for the misfortunes that befall me, for you have no part in them.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhat do you mean, no part?\u201d responded Sancho. \u201cBy some chance was the man tossed in a blanket yesterday anybody but my father\u2019s son? And the saddlebags that are missing today, along with all my valuable goods, do they belong to anybody else but me?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cDid you say that the saddlebags are missing, Sancho?\u201d said Don Quixote.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cYes, they\u2019re missing,\u201d responded Sancho.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThen we have nothing to eat today,\u201d replied Don Quixote.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat would be true,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cif these fields didn\u2019t have the wild plants your grace says you know about, the ones that unfortunate knights errant such as your grace use to make up for shortages like this one.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cDespite that,\u201d Don Quixote responded, \u201cnow I would rather have a ration of bread or a large loaf and a couple of sardine heads than all the plants described by Dioscorides or commented on by Dr. Laguna.139<\/a><\/span><\/sup> But be that as it may, mount your donkey, my good Sancho, and follow me, for God, who provides all things, will not fail us, especially since we are so much in His service, when He does not fail the gnats in the air, or the grubs in the earth, or the tadpoles in the water; He is so merciful that He makes His sun to shine on the good and the evil and His rain to fall on the unjust and the just.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cYour grace would do better,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cas a preacher than as a knight errant.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cKnights errant knew and must know about everything, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cbecause there were knights errant in past times who would stop to give a sermon or a talk in the middle of the field of battle just as if they were graduates of the University of Paris, from which one can infer that the lance never blunted the pen, nor the pen the lance.\u201d<\/p>\r\n \r\n

\u201cFine, whatever your grace says,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cbut let\u2019s leave now and find a place to spend the night, and, God willing, there won\u2019t be any blankets, or people who toss blankets, or phantoms, or enchanted Moors, and if there are, I\u2019ll send the whole pack of them to the devil.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cGod\u2019s will be done, my son,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cand lead the way, for this time I want you to select the place where we shall sleep. But first give me your hand, and feel with your finger, and see how many teeth and molars I am missing here on the right side of my upper jaw, for that is where I feel the pain.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Sancho put his fingers in his master\u2019s mouth, and as he was feeling inside, he said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cHow many molars did your grace have on this side?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cFour,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cand except for the wisdom tooth, all of them sound and healthy.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, your grace should think carefully about what you\u2019re saying,\u201d Sancho responded.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI say four, or perhaps five,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbecause never in my life have I had a tooth or molar pulled, nor has one ever fallen out, or been eaten by decay, or afflicted by any abscess.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWell, in this lower part,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cyour grace has no more than two and a half molars, and in the upper part, none at all, not even a half; it\u2019s all as smooth as the palm of your hand.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWoe is me!\u201d said Don Quixote when he heard the sad news from his squire. \u201cI should rather have lost an arm, as long as it was not the one that wields my sword. For I must tell you, Sancho, that a mouth without molars is like a mill without a millstone, and dentation is to be valued much more than diamonds. But we who profess the arduous order of chivalry are subject to all of this. Mount, my friend, and lead the way, for I shall follow you along any path you choose.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Sancho did so and headed in the direction where he thought they might find lodging without leaving the king\u2019s highway, which was very well traveled in that area.<\/p>\r\n

They rode very slowly because the pain in Don Quixote\u2019s jaws gave him no peace and did not allow him to go any faster; Sancho wanted to divert and distract him by talking to him, and among other things, he said what will be related in the next chapter.<\/p>\r\n","rendered":"

CHAPTER XVIII<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

Which relates the words that passed between Sancho Panza and his master, Don Quixote, and other adventures that deserve to be recounted<\/span><\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

When Sancho reached his master, he was so weak and enfeebled that he could not even prod his donkey. Seeing him in this state, Don Quixote said:<\/p>\n

\u201cNow I am convinced, my good Sancho, that this castle or inn is undoubtedly enchanted, because what else could those who so brutally took their amusement with you be but phantoms or beings from the next world? And I can attest to this because I saw, when I was at the wall of the corral watching the events in your sad tragedy, that it was not possible for me to climb over the wall or even to dismount Rocinante, and therefore they must have enchanted me, for I swear to you, by who I am, that if I could have climbed over or dismounted, I should have avenged you in a way that would have made those varlets and knaves remember the experience for the rest of their days, even though by so doing I should have contravened the laws of chivalry, which, as I have told you so often, do not permit a knight to raise a hand against one who is not a knight, except in defense of his own life and person in circumstances of urgent and great necessity.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI would have taken my revenge, too, if I could have, knight or no knight, but I couldn\u2019t, though in my opinion the ones who had so much fun with me weren\u2019t phantoms or enchanted beings, as your grace says, but men of flesh and blood, like us; and all of them, as I heard when they were making me turn somersaults, had names, and one was Pedro Mart\u00ednez, and the other Tenorio Hern\u00e1ndez, and I heard that the innkeeper\u2019s name was Lefthanded Juan Palomeque. And so, Se\u00f1or, your not being able to get over the corral wall or off your horse was due to <\/a>something besides enchantments. And what\u2019s clear to me in all this is that in the long run, these adventures we\u2019re looking for will bring us so many misadventures that we won\u2019t know our right foot from our left. And the better and smarter thing, to the best of my poor understanding, would be for us to go back home now that it\u2019s harvesttime, and tend to our own affairs, and stop going from pillar to post and from bad to worse, as they say.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow little you know, Sancho,\u201d Don Quixote responded, \u201cabout the matter of chivalry! Be quiet and have patience, for the day will come when you will see with your own eyes how honorable a thing it is to exercise this profession. If not, then tell me: what greater joy can there be in the world, what pleasure can equal that of conquering in battle and defeating one\u2019s enemy? None, most certainly there is none.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat must be true,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cthough I don\u2019t know anything about it; all I know is that ever since we\u2019ve been knights errant, or your grace has been one (because there\u2019s no reason to include me in so honorable a company), we haven\u2019t won a single battle except for the one with the Basque, and even there your grace came out missing half an ear and half a shield; since then it\u2019s been nothing but cudgels and more cudgels, beatings and more beatings, and for me the extra advantage of being tossed in a blanket by enchanted beings, but I can\u2019t take my revenge on them so I\u2019ll never know how great the pleasure is of defeating my enemy, as your grace says.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat is my sorrow, and it surely is yours as well, Sancho,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbut from this moment on I shall try to have at hand some sword so artfully made that whosoever carries it will be immune to any kind of enchantment; it well might be that fortune will grant me the one Amad\u00eds had when he was called The Knight of the Blazing Sword,<\/span> 132<\/a><\/span><\/sup> that being one of the best swords any knight in the world ever had, because, in addition to the virtue I have already mentioned, it cut like a razor, and no armor, no matter how strong or enchanted, could withstand it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m so lucky,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthat when that happens and your grace finds such a sword, it\u2019ll be exactly like the balm and only work for and benefit dubbed knights, while squires can just swallow their sorrows.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo not be afraid, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cfor heaven will deal more kindly with you than that.\u201d<\/p>\n

As Don Quixote and his squire were having this conversation, Don <\/a>Quixote saw a large, thick cloud of dust coming toward them along the road they were traveling, and when he saw it, he turned to Sancho and said:<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is the day, O Sancho, when the good fortune that destiny has reserved for me will be revealed! This is the day, I say, when, as much as on any other, the valor of this my arm will be proved, and I shall perform deeds that will be inscribed in the book of Fame for all time to come. Do you see that cloud of dust rising there, Sancho? Well, it conceals a vast army, composed of innumerable and diverse peoples, which is marching toward us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s the case, there must be two,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cbecause over in the opposite direction there\u2019s another cloud of dust just like it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Don Quixote turned to look, and he saw that it was true; he was overjoyed, thinking, no doubt, that these were two armies coming to attack and fight each other in the middle of that broad plain. Because at all times and at every moment his fantasy was filled with the battles, enchantments, feats, follies, loves, and challenges recounted in books of chivalry, and everything he said, thought, or did was directed toward such matters. The dust clouds he saw had been raised by two large flocks of ewes and rams traveling along the same road from opposite directions, which could not be seen through the dust until they were very close. But Don Quixote insisted so fervently they were armies that Sancho believed him and said:<\/p>\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, then what should we do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo?\u201d said Don Quixote. \u201cDefend and protect the needy and helpless. You must know, Sancho, that the army in front of us is led and directed by the great Emperor Alifanfar\u00f3n, lord of the great \u00cdnsula Trapobane;133<\/a><\/span><\/sup> the other, marching behind us, belongs to his enemy, the king of the Garamantes, Pentapol\u00edn of the Tucked-up Sleeve, so-called because he always enters into battle with a bare right arm.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy do these two gentlemen hate each other so much?\u201d asked Sancho.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey hate each other,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbecause this Alifanfar\u00f3n, a fierce pagan, is in love with Pentapol\u00edn\u2019s daughter, an exceedingly beauteous and charming lady, and a Christian, whose father does <\/a>not wish to give her to the pagan king unless he first renounces the law of his false prophet Mohammed and turns to her faith.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBy my beard,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cPentapol\u00edn is doing just the right thing, and I\u2019m bound to help him any way I can!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIn this you would be doing just as you should, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cbecause to enter into battles such as these it is not required to be dubbed a knight.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s good enough for me,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cbut where will we put this donkey so we\u2019re sure to find him when the fight\u2019s over? Because I don\u2019t believe that riding into battle on this kind of animal has been the custom up to now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat is true,\u201d said Don Quixote. \u201cWhat you can do is let him find his own adventures, regardless of whether he is lost or not, because we shall have so many horses when we emerge victorious that even Rocinante runs the risk of being exchanged for another. But listen to me, and look, for I want to name for you the most eminent knights riding in these two armies. And so that you may see and mark them more clearly, let us withdraw to that hillock, where we should be able to perceive both armies.\u201d<\/p>\n

This they did, riding to the top of a hill from which there would have been a clear view of the two flocks that Don Quixote took for armies if the clouds of dust they raised had not confused and blurred the sight of anyone looking at them, but despite this, in his imagination he saw what he did not see and what was not there, and in a loud voice he began to say:<\/p>\n

\u201cThat knight you see there in the gold-colored armor, who bears on his shield a crowned lion kneeling at the feet of a damsel, is the valiant Laurcalco,134<\/a><\/span><\/sup> lord of the Bridge of Silver; the other in armor with flowers of gold, who bears on his shield three crowns of silver on a blue field, is the redoubtable Micocolembo, grand duke of Quirocia; the one on his right with the gigantic limbs is the never fearful Brandabarbar\u00e1n de Boliche, lord of the three Arabias, whose armor is a snakeskin and whose shield is a door rumored to be one of those from the temple demolished by Samson when, with his death, he wreaked vengeance on his enemies. Now turn your eyes in the other direction, and you will see in front of <\/a>and at the head of the other army the ever victorious and never defeated Timonel of Carcajona, prince of Nueva Vizcaya, who wears his armor quartered\u2014blue, green, white, and yellow\u2014and who bears on his shield a cat of gold on a tawny field, with a legend that reads: Meow,<\/span> which is the beginning of the name of his lady who, they say, is the peerless Miulina, daughter of Duke Alfe\u00f1iqu\u00e9n of Algarbe; this other, who weighs down and oppresses the back of that powerful mare, whose armor is snowy white and whose shield is blank and lacking all devices, is a novice knight of the French nation, named Pierres Pap\u00edn, lord of the baronies of Utrique; that one, who with armored heels is kicking the flanks of that colorful swift zebra and whose armor bears blue vairs,135<\/a><\/span><\/sup> is the powerful duke of Nervia, Espartafilardo del Bosque, who bears as a device on his shield a bed of asparagus, with a legend in Castilian that reads: Follow my fate.\u201d<\/span> 136<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\n

And in this fashion he named many knights from the two hosts, which he was imagining, and for all of them he improvised armor, colors, legends, and devices, carried along by the imagination of his unheard-of madness, and without pausing he continued, saying:<\/p>\n

\u201cThis host facing us is made up and composed of people from diverse nations: here are those who drink the sweet waters of the famous Xanthus;137<\/a><\/span><\/sup> the mountain folk who tread the Massilian plain; those who sift fine gold nuggets in Arabia Felix; those who enjoy the famous cool shores of the crystalline Thermodon; those who drain by many diverse means the golden Pactolus; and Numidians, untrustworthy in their promises; Persians, those notable archers; Parthians and Medes, who fight as they flee; Arabians, with movable houses; Scythians, as cruel as they are white-skinned; Ethiopians, with pierced lips; and an infinite number of other nations, whose faces I recognize and see, although I do not recall their names. In this other host come those who drink the crystalline currents of the olive-bearing Betis; those who shine and burnish their faces with the liquid of the forever rich and golden Tajo; those who enjoy the beneficial waters of the divine Genil; those who tread Tartessian fields, with their abundant pastures; those who take pleasure in the <\/a>Elysian meadows of Jerez; Manchegans, rich and crowned with yellow spikes of wheat; those clad in iron, ancient relics of Gothic blood; those who bathe in the Pisuerga, famous for the gentleness of its current; those who graze their cattle on the extensive pasturelands of the sinuous Guadiana, celebrated for its hidden currents; those who tremble in the cold of the wooded Pyrenees and the white peaks of the high Apennines; in short, all those contained and sheltered in the entirety of Europe.\u201d<\/p>\n

Lord save me! What a number of provinces he mentioned and nations he named, attributing to each one, with marvelous celerity, the characteristics that belonged to it, so absorbed and immersed was he in his lying books!<\/p>\n

Sancho Panza hung on his words but said none of his own, and from time to time he turned his head to see if he could see the knights and giants his master was naming; since he could not make out any of them, he said:<\/p>\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, may the devil take me, but no man, giant, or knight of all those your grace has mentioned can be seen anywhere around here; at least, I don\u2019t see them; maybe it\u2019s all enchantment, like last night\u2019s phantoms.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can you say that?\u201d responded Don Quixote. \u201cDo you not hear the neighing of the horses, the call of the clarions, the sound of the drums?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t hear anything,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cexcept the bleating of lots of sheep.\u201d<\/p>\n

And this was the truth, because the two flocks were drawing near.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt is your fear, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cthat keeps you from seeing or hearing properly, because one of the effects of fear is to cloud the senses and make things appear other than they are; if you are so frightened, withdraw somewhere and leave me alone; alone I suffice to give victory to the army to whom I shall proffer my assistance.\u201d<\/p>\n

And having said this, he spurred Rocinante, fixed his lance in its socket, and rode down the side of the hill like a flash of lightning. Sancho called to him, saying:<\/p>\n

\u201cYour grace, come back, Se\u00f1or Don Quixote, I swear to God you\u2019re charging sheep! Come back, by the wretched father who sired me! What madness is this? Look and see that there are no giants or knights, no cats or armor or shields either parted or whole, no blue vairs or bedeviled ones, either. Poor sinner that I am in the sight of God, what are you doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

But none of this made Don Quixote turn back; instead, in a loud voice, he cried:<\/p>\n

\u201cCome, you knights who follow and serve under the banners of the valiant Emperor Pentapol\u00edn of the Tucked-up Sleeve, follow me, all of you, and you will see how easily I give you revenge upon your enemy Alifanfar\u00f3n of Trapobane!\u201d<\/p>\n

Saying this, he rode into the midst of the host of sheep and began to run at them with his lance as fearlessly and courageously as if he really were attacking his mortal enemies. The shepherds and herdsmen guarding the flock came running, shouting for him to stop, but seeing that this had no effect, they unhooked their slings and began to greet his ears with stones as big as fists. Don Quixote took no notice of the stones; instead, he rode back and forth, crying:<\/p>\n

\u201cWhere art thou, haughty Alifanfar\u00f3n? Come here to me, for I am only one knight who wishes, in single combat, to try thy strength and take thy life as forfeit for the wrong thou hast done to the valiant Pentapol\u00edn Garamanta.\u201d<\/p>\n

At that moment, a small round pebble138<\/a><\/span><\/sup> came flying and hit him in the side, entombing two ribs inside his body. Seeing himself so battered, he undoubtedly believed he was dead or gravely wounded, and remembering his potion, he took out the cruet, put it to his mouth, and began to pour the potion into his stomach, but before he had finished swallowing what seemed to him a sufficient quantity, another almond came flying and hit his hand, striking the cruet so squarely that it broke into pieces, taking along three or four teeth and molars from his mouth and smashing two of his fingers.<\/p>\n

The first blow was so hard, as well as the second, that the poor knight could not help falling from his horse. The shepherds came running and thought they had killed him, and so they hurriedly gathered their flocks together, picked up the dead animals, which numbered more than seven, and left without further inquiry.<\/p>\n

All this time Sancho was on the hill, watching the lunatic actions of his master, and he tore at his beard, cursing the hour and the moment when fortune had allowed him to make his acquaintance. When he saw that Don Quixote was lying on the ground and that the shepherds had gone, he came down the slope and went over to his master and found <\/a>him in a very bad way, although he had not lost consciousness, and he said to him:<\/p>\n

\u201cDidn\u2019t I tell you, Se\u00f1or Don Quixote, to come back, that it wasn\u2019t armies you were attacking but flocks of sheep?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is how that thieving wise man, who is my enemy, can make things disappear and seem to be what they are not. You should know, Sancho, that it is very easy for those like him to make us see whatever they wish, and this villain who pursues me, envious of the glory that he saw I would achieve in this battle, has turned the contending armies into flocks of sheep. And if you do not believe me, by my life you can do something, Sancho, to be undeceived and see the truth of what I am telling you: mount your donkey and follow them, with some cunning, and you will see how, when they have moved a certain distance away, they resume their original form and are no longer sheep but real, complete men, just as I first described them to you\u2026. But do not go now, for I have need of your help and assistance; come here and see how many molars and teeth I have lost, because it seems to me I do not have a single one left in my mouth.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sancho came so close that his eyes were almost in his master\u2019s mouth; by this time the balm had taken effect in Don Quixote\u2019s stomach, and just as Sancho looked into his mouth, he threw up, more vigorously than if he were firing a musket, everything he had inside, and all of it hit the compassionate squire in the face.<\/p>\n

\u201cMother of God!\u201d said Sancho. \u201cWhat\u2019s happened? Surely this poor sinner is mortally wounded, for he\u2019s vomiting blood from his mouth.\u201d<\/p>\n

But looking a little more closely, he realized by the color, taste, and smell that it was not blood but the balm from the cruet, which he had seen him drink, and he was so disgusted by this that his stomach turned over and he vomited his innards all over his master, and the two of them were left as splendid as pearls. Sancho went to his donkey to find something in the saddlebags with which to clean himself and heal his master, and when he did not see the saddlebags he almost lost his mind. He cursed his fate again and resolved in his heart to leave his master and return home even if he lost his wages for the time he had worked, along with his hopes for the governorship of the promised \u00ednsula.<\/p>\n

Then Don Quixote rose to his feet, placed his left hand over his mouth so that no more teeth would fall out, and grasped Rocinante\u2019s reins with the other, for the horse had not moved from his master\u2019s side\u2014that is how loyal and well-disposed he was\u2014and walked to where <\/a>his squire was standing, leaning against his donkey and resting his cheek in his hand, in the manner of a man deep in thought. And seeing him like this, showing signs of so much sadness, Don Quixote said:<\/p>\n

\u201cYou should know, Sancho, that a man is not worth more than any other if he does not do more than any other. All these squalls to which we have been subjected are signs that the weather will soon improve and things will go well for us, because it is not possible for the bad or the good to endure forever; from this it follows that since the bad has lasted so long a time, the good is close at hand. Therefore you must not grieve for the misfortunes that befall me, for you have no part in them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you mean, no part?\u201d responded Sancho. \u201cBy some chance was the man tossed in a blanket yesterday anybody but my father\u2019s son? And the saddlebags that are missing today, along with all my valuable goods, do they belong to anybody else but me?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDid you say that the saddlebags are missing, Sancho?\u201d said Don Quixote.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes, they\u2019re missing,\u201d responded Sancho.<\/p>\n

\u201cThen we have nothing to eat today,\u201d replied Don Quixote.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat would be true,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cif these fields didn\u2019t have the wild plants your grace says you know about, the ones that unfortunate knights errant such as your grace use to make up for shortages like this one.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDespite that,\u201d Don Quixote responded, \u201cnow I would rather have a ration of bread or a large loaf and a couple of sardine heads than all the plants described by Dioscorides or commented on by Dr. Laguna.139<\/a><\/span><\/sup> But be that as it may, mount your donkey, my good Sancho, and follow me, for God, who provides all things, will not fail us, especially since we are so much in His service, when He does not fail the gnats in the air, or the grubs in the earth, or the tadpoles in the water; He is so merciful that He makes His sun to shine on the good and the evil and His rain to fall on the unjust and the just.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYour grace would do better,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cas a preacher than as a knight errant.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cKnights errant knew and must know about everything, Sancho,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cbecause there were knights errant in past times who would stop to give a sermon or a talk in the middle of the field of battle just as if they were graduates of the University of Paris, from which one can infer that the lance never blunted the pen, nor the pen the lance.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cFine, whatever your grace says,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cbut let\u2019s leave now and find a place to spend the night, and, God willing, there won\u2019t be any blankets, or people who toss blankets, or phantoms, or enchanted Moors, and if there are, I\u2019ll send the whole pack of them to the devil.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGod\u2019s will be done, my son,\u201d said Don Quixote, \u201cand lead the way, for this time I want you to select the place where we shall sleep. But first give me your hand, and feel with your finger, and see how many teeth and molars I am missing here on the right side of my upper jaw, for that is where I feel the pain.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sancho put his fingers in his master\u2019s mouth, and as he was feeling inside, he said:<\/p>\n

\u201cHow many molars did your grace have on this side?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cFour,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cand except for the wisdom tooth, all of them sound and healthy.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, your grace should think carefully about what you\u2019re saying,\u201d Sancho responded.<\/p>\n

\u201cI say four, or perhaps five,\u201d responded Don Quixote, \u201cbecause never in my life have I had a tooth or molar pulled, nor has one ever fallen out, or been eaten by decay, or afflicted by any abscess.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, in this lower part,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cyour grace has no more than two and a half molars, and in the upper part, none at all, not even a half; it\u2019s all as smooth as the palm of your hand.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWoe is me!\u201d said Don Quixote when he heard the sad news from his squire. \u201cI should rather have lost an arm, as long as it was not the one that wields my sword. For I must tell you, Sancho, that a mouth without molars is like a mill without a millstone, and dentation is to be valued much more than diamonds. But we who profess the arduous order of chivalry are subject to all of this. Mount, my friend, and lead the way, for I shall follow you along any path you choose.\u201d<\/p>\n

Sancho did so and headed in the direction where he thought they might find lodging without leaving the king\u2019s highway, which was very well traveled in that area.<\/p>\n

They rode very slowly because the pain in Don Quixote\u2019s jaws gave him no peace and did not allow him to go any faster; Sancho wanted to divert and distract him by talking to him, and among other things, he said what will be related in the next chapter.<\/p>\n

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