{"id":283,"date":"2019-12-01T16:45:25","date_gmt":"2019-12-01T16:45:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/chapter\/second-part-chapter-xlvii-2\/"},"modified":"2020-03-31T19:04:18","modified_gmt":"2020-03-31T19:04:18","slug":"second-part-chapter-xlvii","status":"publish","type":"chapter","link":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/chapter\/second-part-chapter-xlvii\/","title":{"rendered":"Second Part. Chapter XLVII"},"content":{"raw":"CHAPTER XLVII<\/a>\r\n
\r\n

In which the account of how Sancho Panza behaved in his governorship continues<\/span><\/h2>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n

The history recounts that Sancho Panza was taken from the courtroom to a sumptuous palace, where, in a large hall, a royal and extremely clean table was set; as soon as Sancho entered the hall, there was a sound of flageolets, and four pages came out with water to wash his hands, which Sancho received with great solemnity.<\/p>\r\n

The music ceased, and Sancho sat down at the head of the table because that was the only chair and the only place laid on the entire table. A personage, who later proved to be a physician, came to stand at his side, holding a rod of whalebone in his hand. They lifted the fine white cloth that covered the fruit and a wide variety of dishes holding different foods; one man who looked like a student said the blessing, and a page put a bib trimmed in lace on Sancho; another who was performing the duties of a butler placed a dish of fruit in front of him; he had barely eaten a mouthful when the man with the rod used it to touch the dish, and it was taken away with extraordinary speed, but the butler placed another dish of different food in front of him. Sancho was about to try it, but before he could reach it and taste it, the rod had touched it and a <\/a>page removed it as quickly as the fruit had been taken away. When he saw this, Sancho was perplexed, and looking at everyone, he asked if the dinner was to be eaten like a conjuring trick. To which the man with the rod responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIt must be eaten, Se\u00f1or Governor, according to the traditions and customs of other \u00ednsulas where there are governors. I, Se\u00f1or, am a physician, and on this \u00ednsula I am paid to tend to its governors, and I care for their health much more than I do my own, studying day and night, and observing the governor\u2019s constitution and temperament in order to successfully cure him if he should fall ill; and the principal thing I do is to be present at his dinners and suppers, and allow him to eat what seems appropriate to me, and to take away what I imagine will do him harm and be injurious to his stomach; and so I ordered the dish of fruit removed because it was too damp, and the other dish as well because it was too hot and had a good number of spices, which increase thirst, and if one drinks too much, one destroys and consumes the radical humor, which is to say, life.\u201d522<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\r\n

\u201cSo that means that the dish of roasted partridges over there, nicely seasoned, it seems to me, won\u2019t do me any harm.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

To which the physician responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThe governor will not eat them as long as I am alive.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cBut why?\u201d said Sancho.<\/p>\r\n

And the physician responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cBecause our master Hippocrates, the polestar and light of medicine, says in one of his aphorisms: Omnis saturatio mala, perdicis autem pessima.<\/span> Which means: \u2018A full stomach is bad, but a stomach full of partridges is very bad.\u2019\u201d523<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\r\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s true,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthen see, Se\u00f1or Doctor, which of the dishes on this table will do me the most good and which the least harm, and let me eat it without you tapping it, because by my life as a governor, and may God allow me to enjoy it, I am dying of hunger, and denying me food, no matter what you tell me, Se\u00f1or Doctor, means taking my life instead of lengthening it.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cYour grace is correct, Se\u00f1or Governor,\u201d responded the physician, \u201cand so, it is my opinion that your grace should not eat the rabbit stew <\/a>over there because that is a long-haired animal. You could have tasted the veal, if it hadn\u2019t been roasted and marinated, but it\u2019s out of the question now.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

And Sancho said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat big bowl steaming over there looks to me like olla podrida,<\/span> 524<\/a><\/span><\/sup> and because those stews have so many different kinds of things in them, I can\u2019t help but come across something that I\u2019ll like and that will be good for me.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cAbsit!\u201d<\/span> 525<\/a><\/span><\/sup> said the physician. \u201cMay so wicked a thought be far from us: there is nothing in the world less nourishing than an olla podrida.<\/span> Let ollas podridas<\/span> be for canons or rectors of colleges or peasant weddings, and keep them away from the tables of governors, where all things exquisite and elegant should be present; the reason is that simple medicines are always more highly esteemed than compound ones, everywhere and by everyone, because there can be no error in simple medicines, but there can be in compound ones, simply by changing the amounts of the things of which they are compounded; but I know that what the governor must eat now in order to preserve and fortify his health is a hundred rolled wafers and some very thin slices of quince, which will settle his stomach and help his digestion.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

Hearing this, Sancho leaned back in his chair and stared fixedly at the physician and in a solemn voice asked him what his name was and where he had studied. To which he responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cMy name, Se\u00f1or Governor, is Dr. Pedro Recio de Ag\u00fcero, and I am a native of a town called Tirteafuera, which is between Caracuel and Almod\u00f3var del Campo, on the right-hand side, and I hold the degree of doctor from the University of Osuna.\u201d526<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\r\n

To which Sancho, in a rage, responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWell, Se\u00f1or Doctor Pedro Recio de Mal Ag\u00fcero,527<\/a><\/span><\/sup> native of Tirteafuera, a village that\u2019s on the right as we go from Caracuel to Almod\u00f3var del Campo, graduated from Osuna, get out of my sight, and if you don\u2019t, I swear by the sun that I\u2019ll take a cudgel, and starting with you, I\u2019ll beat all the doctors so hard there won\u2019t be a single one left anywhere on the \u00edn<\/a>sula, at least the ones I know to be ignorant, because wise, prudent, and intelligent doctors I\u2019ll respect and honor as if they were divine. And again I say that you should leave here, Pedro Recio, otherwise I\u2019ll take this chair that I\u2019m sitting on and smash it over your head, and they can bring charges against me and I\u2019ll clear myself by saying that I did a service for God when I killed a bad doctor, who\u2019s the same as an executioner. Now, all of you, give me something to eat, otherwise take your governorship back, because an office that doesn\u2019t give a man food to eat isn\u2019t worth two beans.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

The physician became very agitated when he saw the governor so enraged, and he wanted to do a tirteafuera<\/span> from the hall, but at that moment a post horn sounded in the street, and the butler went to look out the window and then returned, saying:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cA courier has come from my lord the duke; he must be carrying an important dispatch.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

The courier came in, perspiring and intimidated, and after taking a sealed letter from inside his shirt, he placed it in the hands of the governor, and Sancho placed it in those of the steward, whom he ordered to read the address, which said: To Don Sancho Panza, governor of the \u00cdnsula Barataria, to be delivered into his own hands or those of his secretary.<\/span> Hearing this, Sancho said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWho here is my secretary?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

And one of those present responded:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI am, Se\u00f1or, because I know how to read and write, and because I\u2019m Basque.\u201d528<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\r\n

\u201cWith that little addition,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cyou could be secretary to the emperor himself. Open that letter and see what it says.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

The newly born secretary did so, and having read what it said, he said it was a matter that required privacy. Sancho ordered the hall cleared, with only the steward and the butler remaining; all the rest, including the physician, left, and then the secretary read the letter, which said:<\/p>\r\n\r\n

\r\n

It has come to my attention, Se\u00f1or Don Sancho Panza, that certain enemies of mine and of the \u00ednsula will launch a furious attack, but I do not know on which night; it is advisable to keep watch and stay on guard so that they do not catch you unprepared. I have also learned through trusted spies that four per-<\/a>sons in disguise have come to that place to take your life, for they fear your cleverness; keep your eyes open, be aware of who comes to speak to you, and do not eat anything that is offered to you. I shall be sure to come to your aid if you find yourself in difficulty, and in everything you will act with your customary intelligence. From this place, the sixteenth of August, at four in the morning.<\/span><\/p>\r\n

Your friend,<\/span>
THE<\/span> DUKE<\/span><\/p>\r\n\r\n<\/div>\r\n

Sancho was astounded, as all the bystanders seemed to be as well, and turning to the steward, he said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhat has to be done now, and done right away, is to put Dr. Recio in jail, because if anybody\u2019s going to kill me, it\u2019ll be him, with the slow, painful death that comes from starvation.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIt also seems to me,\u201d said the butler, \u201cthat your grace shouldn\u2019t eat anything that is on this table because it was prepared by nuns, and as the saying goes, behind the cross lurks the devil.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI don\u2019t deny it,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cand for now give me a piece of bread and about four pounds of grapes, because they really can\u2019t be poisoned, and I can\u2019t get by without eating, and if we have to be ready for those battles that are threatening us, we\u2019ll need to be well-fed, because a full belly gives you courage and not the other way around. And you, Secretary, answer my lord the duke and tell him that all his orders will be carried out as ordered, to the letter; and send my lady the duchess a kiss on the hand from me, and say that I beg her not to forget to send a messenger with my letter and my bundle to my wife, Teresa Panza, and I\u2019ll be very grateful, and I\u2019ll be sure to serve her to the best of my ability; and while you\u2019re at it you can include a kiss on the hand for my master, Don Quixote of La Mancha, so that he can see that I\u2019m grateful; and you, like a good secretary and a good Basque, can add anything you want that\u2019s to the point. Now clear the table and give me something to eat, and then I\u2019ll take on all the spies and killers and enchanters who want to attack me and my \u00ednsula.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

At this moment a page came in and said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a farmer here, a petitioner, who wants to talk to your lordship about a matter that he says is very important.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIt\u2019s strange,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cabout these petitioners. Is it possible they\u2019re so foolish they can\u2019t see that this isn\u2019t the right time of day to come with their petitions? By some chance aren\u2019t those of us who are <\/a>governors and judges men of flesh and blood, too, and don\u2019t we need to have time to rest, or do they think we\u2019re made of marble? By God and my conscience, if my governorship lasts (and I have an idea it won\u2019t), I\u2019ll get these petitioners under control. Now tell this good man to come in, but make sure first that he isn\u2019t one of those spies, or a killer who wants to murder me.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cNo, Se\u00f1or,\u201d responded the page, \u201cbecause he seems a simple soul, and either I don\u2019t know much or he\u2019s as good as a piece of bread.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThere\u2019s nothing to fear,\u201d said the steward. \u201cWe\u2019re all here.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cButler, would it be possible,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cnow that Dr. Pedro Recio isn\u2019t here, for me to eat something with a little more weight and substance, even if it\u2019s a piece of bread and an onion?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cTonight the supper will make up for the defects in your dinner, and your lordship will be well-satisfied and content,\u201d said the butler.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cMay God grant us that,\u201d responded Sancho.<\/p>\r\n

And at this point the farmer came in, a man of very decent appearance, and from a thousand leagues away one could see that he was honest and a good soul. The first thing he said was:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhich one of you is the governor?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWho else would it be,\u201d responded the secretary, \u201cexcept the one who\u2019s sitting on the chair?\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThen I humble myself in his presence,\u201d said the farmer.<\/p>\r\n

And going down on his knees, he asked for Sancho\u2019s hand to kiss. Sancho refused and ordered him to stand and tell him what he wanted. The farmer complied and said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, I\u2019m a farmer, a native of Miguel Turra, a village two leagues from Ciudad Real.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWe have another Tirteafuera!\u201d said Sancho. \u201cGo on, brother, for I can tell you that I know Miguel Turra very well, and it\u2019s not very far from my village.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWell, Se\u00f1or, the fact is,\u201d the farmer continued, \u201cthat I, by the grace of God, am married with the blessing and consent of the Holy Roman Catholic Church; I have two sons who are students: the younger is studying for his bachelor\u2019s degree and the older one for his licentiate; I\u2019m a widower because my wife died, or I should say, a bad doctor killed her, purging her when she was pregnant, and if it had been God\u2019s will for the child to be born, and if it had been a boy, I would have had him study medicine so he wouldn\u2019t be envious of his brothers, the bachelor and the licentiate.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWhich means,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthat if your wife hadn\u2019t died, or hadn\u2019t been killed, you wouldn\u2019t be a widower now.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cNo, Se\u00f1or, not at all,\u201d responded the farmer.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWell, that\u2019s a fine thing!\u201d replied Sancho. \u201cGo on, brother, because now\u2019s the time for sleep, not petitions.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll tell you,\u201d said the farmer, \u201cthat my son who\u2019s studying to be a bachelor fell in love with a maiden from our village named Clara Perlerina, the daughter of Andr\u00e9s Perlerino, a very rich farmer; and this name of Perler\u00edn doesn\u2019t come to them from their ancestry or family, but because everyone in this lineage is palsied, and to improve the name they\u2019re called Perler\u00edn,529<\/a><\/span><\/sup> though if truth be told, the maiden is like an Oriental pearl, and looked at from the right side she seems a flower of the field; from the left side it\u2019s a different story, because she lost that eye when she had smallpox; and though she has many large pockmarks on her face, those who love her dearly say that those aren\u2019t pockmarks but the graves where the souls of her suitors are buried. She\u2019s so clean that in order not to dirty her face her nose, as they say, is so turned up that it looks like it\u2019s running away from her mouth; and still she looks extremely attractive because her mouth is large, and if it weren\u2019t missing ten or twelve teeth, it would be counted and considered as one of the best formed. I have nothing to say about her lips, because they\u2019re so thin and delicate that if it were usual to wind lips, they could be made into a nice skein, but since their color\u2019s different from the one commonly found in lips, they seem miraculous, because they\u2019re a mottled blue, green, and purple; and, Se\u00f1or Governor, please forgive me for painting in so much detail the traits of the woman who, in the long run, is going to be my daughter, because I love her dearly and think she\u2019s fine.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cPaint as much as you like,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cbecause I\u2019m enjoying the picture, and if I had eaten, there couldn\u2019t be a better dessert for me than your portrait.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI still have that to serve to you,\u201d responded the farmer, \u201cbut a time will come when we\u2019re ready for it, if we aren\u2019t now. And I say, Se\u00f1or, that if I could paint her elegance and the height of her body, it would be something amazing, but that\u2019s impossible, because she\u2019s stooped and hunched over, and her mouth is down to her knees, and even so, it\u2019s clear to see that if she could stand up, her head would touch the ceiling; <\/a>she would have given her hand in marriage to my bachelor by now, but she can\u2019t extend it because it\u2019s withered, and with it all, by her long grooved nails, you can see how well made and shapely it is.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cThat\u2019s fine,\u201d said Sancho. \u201cYou should realize, brother, that now you\u2019ve painted her from head to toe. What is it that you want? And get to the point without beating around the bush or going around in circles, or taking anything away or adding anything on.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, I would like,\u201d responded the farmer, \u201cfor your grace to be so good as to give me a letter of support for her father, asking him kindly to allow this marriage to take place, for we are not unequal in our fortunes or our natures; to tell you the truth, Se\u00f1or Governor, my son is possessed, and not a day goes by that evil spirits do not torment him; because he fell once into the fire, his face is as wrinkled as parchment, and his eyes are somewhat teary and runny, but he has the disposition of an angel, and if he didn\u2019t beat and punch himself, he would be a saint.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cIs there anything else you want, my good man?\u201d replied Sancho.<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI would like something else,\u201d said the farmer, \u201cexcept I don\u2019t dare to say it; but, well, after all, whether I get it or not, it shouldn\u2019t fester inside. And so, Se\u00f1or, I would like your grace to give me three hundred or six hundred ducados<\/span> to help with my bachelor\u2019s dowry, I mean, to help him set up a house, because, after all, they have to live on their own and not be subject to the interference of in-laws.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cSee if there\u2019s anything else you want,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cand don\u2019t be too shy or too embarrassed to say it.\u201d<\/p>\r\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m certain, there\u2019s nothing else,\u201d responded the farmer.<\/p>\r\n

And as soon as he said this, the governor rose to his feet, picked up the chair where he had been sitting, and said:<\/p>\r\n

\u201cI swear, Don Crass and Crude, if you don\u2019t leave and get out of my sight right now, I\u2019ll break and crack your head open with this chair! Scoundrel and whoreson, the demon\u2019s own painter, is this the right time to come and ask me for six hundred ducados?<\/span> Where would I have them, you unbearable pest? And why would I give them to you if I did have them, you shifty fool? And what do I care about Miguel Turra and the lineage of the Perler\u00edn? Get away from me, I say, or by the life of my lord the duke, I\u2019ll do what I said! You can\u2019t be from Miguel Turra, you must be some sly devil sent here from hell to tempt me. Tell me, you merciless man, I haven\u2019t had the governorship for a day and a half yet, and you want me to have six hundred ducados?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\r\n

The butler signaled to the farmer to leave the hall, which he did, <\/a>head lowered and apparently fearful that the governor would act on his rage, for the great scoundrel knew his trade very well.<\/p>\r\n

But let us leave Sancho and his rage, dear reader, with no argument or quarrel, and return to Don Quixote, whom we left with his face bandaged and treated for his feline wounds, which did not heal for eight days, and on one of them something happened that Cide Hamete promises to recount as exactly and truthfully as all things in this history are recounted, no matter how trivial they may be.<\/p>\r\n","rendered":"

CHAPTER XLVII<\/a><\/p>\n

\n

In which the account of how Sancho Panza behaved in his governorship continues<\/span><\/h2>\n<\/div>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n

The history recounts that Sancho Panza was taken from the courtroom to a sumptuous palace, where, in a large hall, a royal and extremely clean table was set; as soon as Sancho entered the hall, there was a sound of flageolets, and four pages came out with water to wash his hands, which Sancho received with great solemnity.<\/p>\n

The music ceased, and Sancho sat down at the head of the table because that was the only chair and the only place laid on the entire table. A personage, who later proved to be a physician, came to stand at his side, holding a rod of whalebone in his hand. They lifted the fine white cloth that covered the fruit and a wide variety of dishes holding different foods; one man who looked like a student said the blessing, and a page put a bib trimmed in lace on Sancho; another who was performing the duties of a butler placed a dish of fruit in front of him; he had barely eaten a mouthful when the man with the rod used it to touch the dish, and it was taken away with extraordinary speed, but the butler placed another dish of different food in front of him. Sancho was about to try it, but before he could reach it and taste it, the rod had touched it and a <\/a>page removed it as quickly as the fruit had been taken away. When he saw this, Sancho was perplexed, and looking at everyone, he asked if the dinner was to be eaten like a conjuring trick. To which the man with the rod responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cIt must be eaten, Se\u00f1or Governor, according to the traditions and customs of other \u00ednsulas where there are governors. I, Se\u00f1or, am a physician, and on this \u00ednsula I am paid to tend to its governors, and I care for their health much more than I do my own, studying day and night, and observing the governor\u2019s constitution and temperament in order to successfully cure him if he should fall ill; and the principal thing I do is to be present at his dinners and suppers, and allow him to eat what seems appropriate to me, and to take away what I imagine will do him harm and be injurious to his stomach; and so I ordered the dish of fruit removed because it was too damp, and the other dish as well because it was too hot and had a good number of spices, which increase thirst, and if one drinks too much, one destroys and consumes the radical humor, which is to say, life.\u201d522<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\n

\u201cSo that means that the dish of roasted partridges over there, nicely seasoned, it seems to me, won\u2019t do me any harm.\u201d<\/p>\n

To which the physician responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cThe governor will not eat them as long as I am alive.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut why?\u201d said Sancho.<\/p>\n

And the physician responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cBecause our master Hippocrates, the polestar and light of medicine, says in one of his aphorisms: Omnis saturatio mala, perdicis autem pessima.<\/span> Which means: \u2018A full stomach is bad, but a stomach full of partridges is very bad.\u2019\u201d523<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\n

\u201cIf that\u2019s true,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthen see, Se\u00f1or Doctor, which of the dishes on this table will do me the most good and which the least harm, and let me eat it without you tapping it, because by my life as a governor, and may God allow me to enjoy it, I am dying of hunger, and denying me food, no matter what you tell me, Se\u00f1or Doctor, means taking my life instead of lengthening it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYour grace is correct, Se\u00f1or Governor,\u201d responded the physician, \u201cand so, it is my opinion that your grace should not eat the rabbit stew <\/a>over there because that is a long-haired animal. You could have tasted the veal, if it hadn\u2019t been roasted and marinated, but it\u2019s out of the question now.\u201d<\/p>\n

And Sancho said:<\/p>\n

\u201cThat big bowl steaming over there looks to me like olla podrida,<\/span> 524<\/a><\/span><\/sup> and because those stews have so many different kinds of things in them, I can\u2019t help but come across something that I\u2019ll like and that will be good for me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAbsit!\u201d<\/span> 525<\/a><\/span><\/sup> said the physician. \u201cMay so wicked a thought be far from us: there is nothing in the world less nourishing than an olla podrida.<\/span> Let ollas podridas<\/span> be for canons or rectors of colleges or peasant weddings, and keep them away from the tables of governors, where all things exquisite and elegant should be present; the reason is that simple medicines are always more highly esteemed than compound ones, everywhere and by everyone, because there can be no error in simple medicines, but there can be in compound ones, simply by changing the amounts of the things of which they are compounded; but I know that what the governor must eat now in order to preserve and fortify his health is a hundred rolled wafers and some very thin slices of quince, which will settle his stomach and help his digestion.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hearing this, Sancho leaned back in his chair and stared fixedly at the physician and in a solemn voice asked him what his name was and where he had studied. To which he responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cMy name, Se\u00f1or Governor, is Dr. Pedro Recio de Ag\u00fcero, and I am a native of a town called Tirteafuera, which is between Caracuel and Almod\u00f3var del Campo, on the right-hand side, and I hold the degree of doctor from the University of Osuna.\u201d526<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\n

To which Sancho, in a rage, responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Se\u00f1or Doctor Pedro Recio de Mal Ag\u00fcero,527<\/a><\/span><\/sup> native of Tirteafuera, a village that\u2019s on the right as we go from Caracuel to Almod\u00f3var del Campo, graduated from Osuna, get out of my sight, and if you don\u2019t, I swear by the sun that I\u2019ll take a cudgel, and starting with you, I\u2019ll beat all the doctors so hard there won\u2019t be a single one left anywhere on the \u00edn<\/a>sula, at least the ones I know to be ignorant, because wise, prudent, and intelligent doctors I\u2019ll respect and honor as if they were divine. And again I say that you should leave here, Pedro Recio, otherwise I\u2019ll take this chair that I\u2019m sitting on and smash it over your head, and they can bring charges against me and I\u2019ll clear myself by saying that I did a service for God when I killed a bad doctor, who\u2019s the same as an executioner. Now, all of you, give me something to eat, otherwise take your governorship back, because an office that doesn\u2019t give a man food to eat isn\u2019t worth two beans.\u201d<\/p>\n

The physician became very agitated when he saw the governor so enraged, and he wanted to do a tirteafuera<\/span> from the hall, but at that moment a post horn sounded in the street, and the butler went to look out the window and then returned, saying:<\/p>\n

\u201cA courier has come from my lord the duke; he must be carrying an important dispatch.\u201d<\/p>\n

The courier came in, perspiring and intimidated, and after taking a sealed letter from inside his shirt, he placed it in the hands of the governor, and Sancho placed it in those of the steward, whom he ordered to read the address, which said: To Don Sancho Panza, governor of the \u00cdnsula Barataria, to be delivered into his own hands or those of his secretary.<\/span> Hearing this, Sancho said:<\/p>\n

\u201cWho here is my secretary?\u201d<\/p>\n

And one of those present responded:<\/p>\n

\u201cI am, Se\u00f1or, because I know how to read and write, and because I\u2019m Basque.\u201d528<\/a><\/span><\/sup><\/p>\n

\u201cWith that little addition,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cyou could be secretary to the emperor himself. Open that letter and see what it says.\u201d<\/p>\n

The newly born secretary did so, and having read what it said, he said it was a matter that required privacy. Sancho ordered the hall cleared, with only the steward and the butler remaining; all the rest, including the physician, left, and then the secretary read the letter, which said:<\/p>\n

\n

It has come to my attention, Se\u00f1or Don Sancho Panza, that certain enemies of mine and of the \u00ednsula will launch a furious attack, but I do not know on which night; it is advisable to keep watch and stay on guard so that they do not catch you unprepared. I have also learned through trusted spies that four per-<\/a>sons in disguise have come to that place to take your life, for they fear your cleverness; keep your eyes open, be aware of who comes to speak to you, and do not eat anything that is offered to you. I shall be sure to come to your aid if you find yourself in difficulty, and in everything you will act with your customary intelligence. From this place, the sixteenth of August, at four in the morning.<\/span><\/p>\n

Your friend,<\/span>
THE<\/span> DUKE<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Sancho was astounded, as all the bystanders seemed to be as well, and turning to the steward, he said:<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat has to be done now, and done right away, is to put Dr. Recio in jail, because if anybody\u2019s going to kill me, it\u2019ll be him, with the slow, painful death that comes from starvation.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt also seems to me,\u201d said the butler, \u201cthat your grace shouldn\u2019t eat anything that is on this table because it was prepared by nuns, and as the saying goes, behind the cross lurks the devil.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t deny it,\u201d responded Sancho, \u201cand for now give me a piece of bread and about four pounds of grapes, because they really can\u2019t be poisoned, and I can\u2019t get by without eating, and if we have to be ready for those battles that are threatening us, we\u2019ll need to be well-fed, because a full belly gives you courage and not the other way around. And you, Secretary, answer my lord the duke and tell him that all his orders will be carried out as ordered, to the letter; and send my lady the duchess a kiss on the hand from me, and say that I beg her not to forget to send a messenger with my letter and my bundle to my wife, Teresa Panza, and I\u2019ll be very grateful, and I\u2019ll be sure to serve her to the best of my ability; and while you\u2019re at it you can include a kiss on the hand for my master, Don Quixote of La Mancha, so that he can see that I\u2019m grateful; and you, like a good secretary and a good Basque, can add anything you want that\u2019s to the point. Now clear the table and give me something to eat, and then I\u2019ll take on all the spies and killers and enchanters who want to attack me and my \u00ednsula.\u201d<\/p>\n

At this moment a page came in and said:<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a farmer here, a petitioner, who wants to talk to your lordship about a matter that he says is very important.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s strange,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cabout these petitioners. Is it possible they\u2019re so foolish they can\u2019t see that this isn\u2019t the right time of day to come with their petitions? By some chance aren\u2019t those of us who are <\/a>governors and judges men of flesh and blood, too, and don\u2019t we need to have time to rest, or do they think we\u2019re made of marble? By God and my conscience, if my governorship lasts (and I have an idea it won\u2019t), I\u2019ll get these petitioners under control. Now tell this good man to come in, but make sure first that he isn\u2019t one of those spies, or a killer who wants to murder me.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Se\u00f1or,\u201d responded the page, \u201cbecause he seems a simple soul, and either I don\u2019t know much or he\u2019s as good as a piece of bread.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s nothing to fear,\u201d said the steward. \u201cWe\u2019re all here.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cButler, would it be possible,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cnow that Dr. Pedro Recio isn\u2019t here, for me to eat something with a little more weight and substance, even if it\u2019s a piece of bread and an onion?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTonight the supper will make up for the defects in your dinner, and your lordship will be well-satisfied and content,\u201d said the butler.<\/p>\n

\u201cMay God grant us that,\u201d responded Sancho.<\/p>\n

And at this point the farmer came in, a man of very decent appearance, and from a thousand leagues away one could see that he was honest and a good soul. The first thing he said was:<\/p>\n

\u201cWhich one of you is the governor?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWho else would it be,\u201d responded the secretary, \u201cexcept the one who\u2019s sitting on the chair?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen I humble myself in his presence,\u201d said the farmer.<\/p>\n

And going down on his knees, he asked for Sancho\u2019s hand to kiss. Sancho refused and ordered him to stand and tell him what he wanted. The farmer complied and said:<\/p>\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, I\u2019m a farmer, a native of Miguel Turra, a village two leagues from Ciudad Real.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe have another Tirteafuera!\u201d said Sancho. \u201cGo on, brother, for I can tell you that I know Miguel Turra very well, and it\u2019s not very far from my village.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Se\u00f1or, the fact is,\u201d the farmer continued, \u201cthat I, by the grace of God, am married with the blessing and consent of the Holy Roman Catholic Church; I have two sons who are students: the younger is studying for his bachelor\u2019s degree and the older one for his licentiate; I\u2019m a widower because my wife died, or I should say, a bad doctor killed her, purging her when she was pregnant, and if it had been God\u2019s will for the child to be born, and if it had been a boy, I would have had him study medicine so he wouldn\u2019t be envious of his brothers, the bachelor and the licentiate.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhich means,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cthat if your wife hadn\u2019t died, or hadn\u2019t been killed, you wouldn\u2019t be a widower now.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Se\u00f1or, not at all,\u201d responded the farmer.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, that\u2019s a fine thing!\u201d replied Sancho. \u201cGo on, brother, because now\u2019s the time for sleep, not petitions.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I\u2019ll tell you,\u201d said the farmer, \u201cthat my son who\u2019s studying to be a bachelor fell in love with a maiden from our village named Clara Perlerina, the daughter of Andr\u00e9s Perlerino, a very rich farmer; and this name of Perler\u00edn doesn\u2019t come to them from their ancestry or family, but because everyone in this lineage is palsied, and to improve the name they\u2019re called Perler\u00edn,529<\/a><\/span><\/sup> though if truth be told, the maiden is like an Oriental pearl, and looked at from the right side she seems a flower of the field; from the left side it\u2019s a different story, because she lost that eye when she had smallpox; and though she has many large pockmarks on her face, those who love her dearly say that those aren\u2019t pockmarks but the graves where the souls of her suitors are buried. She\u2019s so clean that in order not to dirty her face her nose, as they say, is so turned up that it looks like it\u2019s running away from her mouth; and still she looks extremely attractive because her mouth is large, and if it weren\u2019t missing ten or twelve teeth, it would be counted and considered as one of the best formed. I have nothing to say about her lips, because they\u2019re so thin and delicate that if it were usual to wind lips, they could be made into a nice skein, but since their color\u2019s different from the one commonly found in lips, they seem miraculous, because they\u2019re a mottled blue, green, and purple; and, Se\u00f1or Governor, please forgive me for painting in so much detail the traits of the woman who, in the long run, is going to be my daughter, because I love her dearly and think she\u2019s fine.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPaint as much as you like,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cbecause I\u2019m enjoying the picture, and if I had eaten, there couldn\u2019t be a better dessert for me than your portrait.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI still have that to serve to you,\u201d responded the farmer, \u201cbut a time will come when we\u2019re ready for it, if we aren\u2019t now. And I say, Se\u00f1or, that if I could paint her elegance and the height of her body, it would be something amazing, but that\u2019s impossible, because she\u2019s stooped and hunched over, and her mouth is down to her knees, and even so, it\u2019s clear to see that if she could stand up, her head would touch the ceiling; <\/a>she would have given her hand in marriage to my bachelor by now, but she can\u2019t extend it because it\u2019s withered, and with it all, by her long grooved nails, you can see how well made and shapely it is.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s fine,\u201d said Sancho. \u201cYou should realize, brother, that now you\u2019ve painted her from head to toe. What is it that you want? And get to the point without beating around the bush or going around in circles, or taking anything away or adding anything on.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSe\u00f1or, I would like,\u201d responded the farmer, \u201cfor your grace to be so good as to give me a letter of support for her father, asking him kindly to allow this marriage to take place, for we are not unequal in our fortunes or our natures; to tell you the truth, Se\u00f1or Governor, my son is possessed, and not a day goes by that evil spirits do not torment him; because he fell once into the fire, his face is as wrinkled as parchment, and his eyes are somewhat teary and runny, but he has the disposition of an angel, and if he didn\u2019t beat and punch himself, he would be a saint.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs there anything else you want, my good man?\u201d replied Sancho.<\/p>\n

\u201cI would like something else,\u201d said the farmer, \u201cexcept I don\u2019t dare to say it; but, well, after all, whether I get it or not, it shouldn\u2019t fester inside. And so, Se\u00f1or, I would like your grace to give me three hundred or six hundred ducados<\/span> to help with my bachelor\u2019s dowry, I mean, to help him set up a house, because, after all, they have to live on their own and not be subject to the interference of in-laws.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSee if there\u2019s anything else you want,\u201d said Sancho, \u201cand don\u2019t be too shy or too embarrassed to say it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, I\u2019m certain, there\u2019s nothing else,\u201d responded the farmer.<\/p>\n

And as soon as he said this, the governor rose to his feet, picked up the chair where he had been sitting, and said:<\/p>\n

\u201cI swear, Don Crass and Crude, if you don\u2019t leave and get out of my sight right now, I\u2019ll break and crack your head open with this chair! Scoundrel and whoreson, the demon\u2019s own painter, is this the right time to come and ask me for six hundred ducados?<\/span> Where would I have them, you unbearable pest? And why would I give them to you if I did have them, you shifty fool? And what do I care about Miguel Turra and the lineage of the Perler\u00edn? Get away from me, I say, or by the life of my lord the duke, I\u2019ll do what I said! You can\u2019t be from Miguel Turra, you must be some sly devil sent here from hell to tempt me. Tell me, you merciless man, I haven\u2019t had the governorship for a day and a half yet, and you want me to have six hundred ducados?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The butler signaled to the farmer to leave the hall, which he did, <\/a>head lowered and apparently fearful that the governor would act on his rage, for the great scoundrel knew his trade very well.<\/p>\n

But let us leave Sancho and his rage, dear reader, with no argument or quarrel, and return to Don Quixote, whom we left with his face bandaged and treated for his feline wounds, which did not heal for eight days, and on one of them something happened that Cide Hamete promises to recount as exactly and truthfully as all things in this history are recounted, no matter how trivial they may be.<\/p>\n

\"image\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"menu_order":48,"template":"","meta":{"pb_show_title":"","pb_short_title":"","pb_subtitle":"","pb_authors":[],"pb_section_license":""},"chapter-type":[],"contributor":[],"license":[],"class_list":["post-283","chapter","type-chapter","status-publish","hentry"],"part":483,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/283","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/chapter"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/283\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1011,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/283\/revisions\/1011"}],"part":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/parts\/483"}],"metadata":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapters\/283\/metadata\/"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=283"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"chapter-type","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/pressbooks\/v2\/chapter-type?post=283"},{"taxonomy":"contributor","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/contributor?post=283"},{"taxonomy":"license","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.publiconsulting.com\/wordpress\/donquixoteoflamancha\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/license?post=283"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}